I moved into a one bedroom apartment all of my own....everyone says...won't you be lonely... answer: sometimes...but mostly, I LOVE IT. Decorated just how I want it... candles everywhere, my bathroom is like being at the beach, filled with bath and body works, i have a sewing station in the living/dining room area...(who needs a dinning room table anyways...) a decent sized kitchen for an apartment...and TONS of closet space...not something I have ever had... annnnnd a balcony, on which my little plants are growing, I bought some pretty flowers today from a roadside stand they are very pretty. I like dirt.
I accidentally froze all the produce and most of the rest of the food, including my water pitcher in the fridge in an effort to make my freezer colder to freeze the margarita stuff for our girls night...which ended up not freezing, and with just me and Sam...it was still way fun, Center Stage and chatting till 2am while eating cookies...and maybe a small dance party...definitely a good evening....(excluding the fact that I am still coughing)
Upper respiratory infection ....left over from whatever virus I got from my patient at work that coughed right in my face, so close I could feel it on my face. I leaning to listen to her heart and said 'Take a deep breath in please" and I was looking at her mouth open as I was speaking and she coughed as she was trying to take a deep breath...not a little cough, like a "Hi, I have been coughing for weeks and can't get rid of my bronchitis" kind of cough. I knew that was the end of it, it was like I inhaled her whole cough. Gross. annnd I got sick ...fluish for 2 days....and now this irritating cough that will probably last for two weeks. And a stuffy nose. (At least I got rid of the virus, I didn't turn into a Swine, and I didn't puke my guts out, all things to be thankful for.)
So here I am 248am, still awake, should be in bed, but I don't have to work tomorrow so why sleep anyways...I have all day... except the sun comes in my window in the morning and wakes me at all hours...and I keep forgetting to buy an eye mask. o-well.
Some days I feel like an adult, a woman, my own place, good job, big girl bed, bills, buying furniture....and then you meet someone, or do something, and there I am feeling 16 again...gees some days I feel like I am in high school again...confused as all get out... know idea what to say, or do or act...awkward...silly...and still totally confused about who I am and what I think and believe...
Somethings I know deep down in my heart... but its hard to keep them on the surface sometimes...and other things creep in...How do you get that stuff that is deep down in your heart, what you know is true, to be on the surface too? How do you get that stuff to be the everyday stuff, and not stuck on the shelf? Beats me...any suggestions ?
Starting to fade...time to attempt sleep...
thanks for tuning in to the ridiculous life of me. Glad my friends love me despite the fact that I am completely and utterly insane... sanity is overrated anyways.
